Nothing brings out the opinions of others like parenthood, as I'm sure you've noticed even complete strangers will feel comfortable offering you all sorts of unsolicited (and sometimes unwelcome) advice. It still amazes me how often people comment on my decision to stay home with my children as opposed to continuing my career and enrolling them in daycare.
Now let me first be very clear, I am absolutely not saying all moms should stay at home with their children and/or it's the "right" choice. The purpose of this post is only to tell you fellow stay-at-home moms to ignore other people's opinions and remind you of what an amazing job you're doing!
Sometimes people don't get it, why would you choose to give up an exciting career to change diapers and wipe noses all day? For the chance to be present for all of your child's "firsts", for the opportunity to be the primary role model and teacher in your child's life, and because we only have our children in our homes for a short time and we want to make the most of it. And what is shocking to many people, we actually enjoy spending time with our children. Most people do, but I've also seen plenty of moms (including SAHM's) who daily can't wait to hand their kid over to childcare, a relative, a program, or anyone else the majority of the time. When these outlets shut down for a week around the holidays and in the summer, these parents are tearing their hair out in frustration because it's only "them and their kids" for the week. That's our house every week, and I have a husband who works long hours and travels for work, sometimes making it only "me and the kids" for the week. Why would I choose to spend this time with them and then hand them off to someone else to raise them? Don't get me wrong, my children are involved in a church class and gymnastics class (each once a week) and they really enjoy both. But that's three hours total, the rest of the week it's up to me to create fun activities and special moments. Last night we brought the kids along to a meeting and decided to have an evening picnic--it was cold, dark and our dinner was pizza but the kids LOVED it! I try to remind myself each week that it doesn't have to be perfect, just remember what is important and why I chose this career in the first place.
Don't let anyone make you feel like you took a step down when you traded in your fancy title for "mommy", you must have been humble to put your pride aside for your children's benefit and I commend you for that. It takes sacrifice to live in this way, you won't get any recognition or financial rewards and you will never get a promotion, but I promise that you could not be investing your time into anything better!
I often hear "I wish I could afford to stay at home with my kids". I never considered staying home, then my son was born and that changed everything. My husband was nervous about going to one income, but agreed to give a try. We were amazed! Not only were we able to "make it" but we had more money, even as our family grew larger! We never looked back and we couldn't be happier...
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Thanks, Joey! This is an important message for stay-at-home moms. They do need support, encouragement, and all that good stuff. And the job IS the most important in the whole world.
ReplyDeleteAmazingly enough I have not gotten many comments, maybe because I had three kids in under three years! It is indeed a wonderful job, yet stressful and demanding. I look forward to when my hubby comes home, as do the boys. Keep doing a great job!!!
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